Thursday, March 31, 2011
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
this may not seem like a huge revelation to you, or even a huge accomplishment, but it's the thing that i have wanted to eat the most since i've been largely pregnant. every week, when i go to the grocery store, i look at them. my personal favorite is an apple fritter. our local grocery store makes a good one. they sell them individually and they sell them in packs of four.
when i walk into the store, i walk by and look at them. sometimes i have even picked them up.
but i have not yet purchased one, which means that i haven't eaten one.
that's not to say that i haven't eaten other ridiculous things, but somehow realizing that i have resisted that particular brand of my personal temptation is a huge victory to me.
today, i just wanted to write that down and say hooray a little, just for myself.
what have you done well lately? what do you deserve a momentary celebration for?
in other news, i'm about 25 minutes away from having this baby (don't get alarmed--not really, but things are progressing, and i don't think it will be too terribly long), so i may not be around for a little while. i'll trust that the ladies will let you know when our Baby Girl is born, and i'll be back with tales of new momhood and, most assuredly, some comedic stories of getting back into a workout routine.
until then, thanks for your continued support of this little blog and, by proxy, of me.
Monday, March 28, 2011
Last night, after putting Avery to sleep, Emma Kate and I were downstairs playing. I went to do the dishes and EK was left to play on her own. It was suspiciously quiet, so I went looking for her. I found her in the place I least wanted to find her (other than a police station), in her sister's crib. She had let herself in, pulled down all of the dresses framed on her wall (along with the frames), climbed in Avery's crib and was undressing her to put on one of the beautiful dresses. Clearly a better outfit for "pwincess" dreaming.
I just about lost my mind. I was so mad. EK got sent right to bed and I cleaned up the mess, nursed Avery back to sleep, and went back downstairs, fuming.
Fast forward to this morning, it's Avery's nap time and she's resting peacefully in her crib. EK and I are downstairs, playing. I go to get some other things taken care of, leaving her by herself. That same quietness came upon the first floor of our house. I immediately dreaded what was about to happen. I began looking for EK and found her, again, in her sister's crib.
This time I did lose my mind. There was plenty of yelling, and even a little, LITTLE swat on the fanny (the only other time this has happened is when she colored all over the wall in her bedroom). Off she went, to sit in her room and cry while I went downstairs to fume.
After her timeout was over, I called her downstairs, gave her a hug, and we talked about what had happened. She then went to play in her playroom while I cleaned up the kitchen. It got quiet again, so I called her name and began to look for her.
This time I found her, not in her sister's crib, but hiding in the corner, quiet as a mouse. I asked her what she was doing and she said, "hidin'." So I asked her what she was hiding from. Her response,
"Mommy is going to yell at me. It makes me sad."
Talk about a major gut check. I struggled to fight back the tears as I realized my two-year old little girl was scared of me. I'm supposed to be the person she runs to when she's scared, not the person she hides from.
So I'm at a loss. I have no clue how to discipline this child. Timeout doesn't really work anymore, at least not for the big offenses (like sneaking into her sister's room and coloring on the walls), I don't want to spank her, and I hate yelling at her. I've said this a lot, but I want to be the type of mother the General Authorities talk about during General Conference. The mother that "rules in righteousness" and never raises her voice.
How on earth did those mothers discipline their toddlers?
Now I don't know how this fits in here on this blog, but this is the biggest thing on my mind, as I'm sure is on many of other mothers' minds. I figured I would ask the question here and open up the comments section as a sounding board for everyone to share their experiences with this... the good, the bad, and the ugly.
What methods of discipline and positive reinforcement work in your house?
If you don't have children yet, what methods did your mother use when you were growing up?
Friday, March 25, 2011
Thursday, March 24, 2011
Are you in a fitness rut? How about some new ideas? I thought it would be fun to come up with an A-Z list of things that I can do for exercise when I feel like I’m doing the same thing everyday. Print it out and keep it for when you are hitting a fitness wall or are bored with your normal routine!
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
Fifteen percent concentrated power of will
Five percent pleasure, fifty percent pain
And a hundred percent reason to remember the name!"
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
|a little snapshot of my daily to-do list routine|
to a certain extent, my ability to manage all of this at once, to varying daily degrees of success, makes me feel like i can take on almost anything. it's not hubris or a great sense of my own superpowers, but more a belief, demonstrated by results, that we can handle all that we are given when we need to.
Monday, March 21, 2011
Friday, March 18, 2011
Thursday, March 17, 2011
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
i've decided that i am absolutely my own worst enemy.
i knew this before, because in this journey of healthy living, it seems the only one who can really make me feel good and terrible about myself, like a total failure, is myself.
it's that persistent, pesky voice of self-loathing that really gets me, the one that violently refuses to acknowledge positive efforts and instead focuses persistently on any small measure of human frailty or weakness, pointing them out as the sum total of my character.
normally, when this happens, i can DO something about it. i can arrest it by taking control of certain things, especially things about my physical world. i can go to an extra gym class, making me feel strong and limber and capable. i can watch what i eat and the weight will come off. the math works, and i feel more in control. i can get a good night's sleep.
i don't have that kind of control right now.
in any way.
for me, that's a challenge that goes beyond the lack of sleep or the painful hips or the pregnancy waddle or the assortment of the other humbling and unpleasant side effects. it's all mental. to try to get outside of my own head, to try to flip the switch from something negative to something positive, is very difficult for me.
i don't think this is foreign to anyone's experience, really. i bring it up not to call attention to myself (i really don't need to do so...i get plenty of stares wherever i go nowadays), but to suggest that we stop that voice more quickly than we normally do.
we often tend to let this voice of self-loathing, self-deprecating criticism derail our progress far too often. we listen to it more readily than the many outside of ourselves who tell us the positive, good, happy news that we are beautiful, accomplished, dynamic, strong, incredible--or whatever it is that is the particular truth we refuse to believe about ourselves.
i don't care who you are: self-loathing gets you nowhere fast. it might motivate you for a while, but in a short amount of time, it will turn every choice into a war fraught with guilt and instability. it creates a gaping chasm that can never be filled, because no matter what you do, you can never make your worst enemy happy.
so what do we do? when we're doing our best, and we still feel the encroaching shadow of this negativity, what do we do to flip the switch?
i've been thinking about this, for obvious reasons. i have decided that, though i can't work the plan that i normally work in these situations, i can take control. i can shift my focus. for me, that means making a more concerted effort on developing the elements of my life that i do have control over: my spirituality, for example, is one of the aspects that i am choosing to focus on. i will be reading my scriptures more often and making more of an effort in my prayers. i can stay busy with the many other things i have in my life, like my work, which make me feel accomplished.
i can actively choose what i focus on. so can you. what you choose to let inside your head, what you choose to allow yourself to get wrapped up in, is what will become your focus.
do you want your focus to be positive or negative? i think we all know the answer to that.
it doesn't make the other stuff go away. i will continue to get bigger. i may have to continue to fight the feeling that, somehow, that's a bad thing. it's the last month, and it's the hardest. that's okay. we all have the things that make us cringe, that bring us to our knees.
i think it's what we do with those things, how we react to them, how we fight back, so to speak, rather than surrender, that sets us apart and determines our level of success.
so tonight, i'll read a chapter of scripture. tomorrow, i'll grade some things and i'll do yoga if only because i will spend 50 minutes breathing deeply. i will go to church and try to serve others. as i do, i'll try to maintain my focus on what i CAN do, what i HAVE done, instead of what i can't control or what isn't working well.
in the process, i believe i'll begin to feel much better about everything.
flip the switch, y'all. don't let that voice take over. it's just not worth it.
Monday, March 7, 2011
your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to go outside more often than you do and enjoy the weather, whatever it is, in your neck of the woods. rediscover an outdoor passion or transfer your normal treadmill workout to the sidewalks in your neighborhood. strap a baby in a stroller and head to the park. open the windows in your house and let the breeze blow in. if you're at work, take a walk during your lunch break or roll the windows down as you drive home.
enjoy the beautiful world that we have been blessed with and do a little spring breaking in your own special way. even if you're not free of your responsibilities, we hereby give you permission to pour some lemonade and put your feet up on a chair outside.
you deserve it, and so do we.
we will be back next week with new posts, so don't leave us! and we expect you to be back with stories of how you made the most of your spring break.
be safe and be healthy!
Friday, March 4, 2011
We'd like to think we can eat healthily enough to get our vitamins and minerals, but with the stresses of everyday life and overproduction of foods, we actually miss out on a lot of those vitamins and minerals our body craves. This is where a good multivitamin comes in.
Then there are the omegas: your fish oils, primrose oils, borage oils, and flaxseed oils. Generally, go for fish oils (the best are derived from smaller fish: anchovies, sardines, etc., but salmon's always a good choice as well. Less chance of mercury poison in these.). But if you're a vegetarian or vegan go for flaxseed oils. When you look for a good omega, look at the back and look at the amount of DHA's and EPA's. DHA is for your neural tissue; builds up your brain, etc. Then EPA is for your heart, skin, and hair health.
Lastly, your probiotic: the good bacteria in your digestive system. With all of the antibiotics that we take and the overprocessed foods, the good bacteria that helps us digest our food gets wiped out and we get left with all sorts of digestive problems. With a good probiotic, the flora in your system gets replaced and your system gets a boost in the right direction.
Of course, all of these will vary according to quality and cost, but just know that most of the time you get what you pay for. All in all, though, it's better to have something than nothing.
Thursday, March 3, 2011
Wednesday, March 2, 2011
Wouldn't it be great if eating healthy was naturally ingrained in our minds? Imagine not having to worry about how many calories I consumed or how many grams of sugar I had that day....because it all evened out.
One day, that will be me. Until then, I will continue to struggle with the choice of eating a carrot or eating an Oreo.
Tuesday, March 1, 2011
(this is much like today, though my attitude has changed from dread to apathy, but that's another discussion for another time.)
i spent the day getting more and more angry at the mere presence of the dishes, feeling used and abused by the reality of life in a house where stuff has to keep getting done because We Are Adults, and when i did finally go in and do the stupid dishes, it was late afternoon and i was in a colossally bad mood.
and it only took me 20 minutes, from start to finish, including cleaning the counters.
my kitchen was clean in 20 minutes.
this was just a revelation to me. i spent hours and hours and hours getting myself worked up over a task that took me 20 minutes to do well. what a monumental waste of time and energy.
i share this not to pat myself on the back (as i mentioned, the dishes are a constant source of annoyance to me, and one of my duties today is to tame them once more), but to suggest that one of the ways that we can help ourselves lead balanced lives is to a) put things into perspective and b) have a plan.
now, when i'm feeling particularly annoyed by a household chore, i set my little ladybug timer (which was a suggestion of a dear friend of mine). if i'm not done in 20 minutes, i'm allowed to do something else for a while and come back. it makes it manageable, at least psychologically, and i'm always amazed that it's almost always done in that time.
the 20 minute rule is new for me, and i've not perfected it, as evidenced by the conspicuous pile of dishes that's part of my to-do list, but i'm working on developing a strategy to balance keeping my home a house of order, a place where peace can reign, with the rest of my life. i am just never going to be one of those people who enjoys cleaning, but i can enjoy the fruits of my labor.
the 20 minute rule helps me stay that way.
what are your strategies for keeping the home that you live in conducive to peaceful, balanced life? i'm dying to shamelessly use all of your strategies!